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Topics - Goatboy

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31
Star Wars: The Old Republic / Digital bonuses/upgrade
« on: December 23, 2011, 08:14:35 PM »
Flare Gun
Training Droid
HoloDancer
HoloCam
STAP In-Game Vehicle

So you can get the above items for 20 euro.

Flare gun = aesthetics? Anyone fired it? I'm guessing this is something you'll never really use.
Training droid = combat assistance? What exactly does this do?
Holodancer = meh. Didn't find the ones in the cantina very interesting at all. Night elf dance was more erection inducing than a holo Twilek.
Holocam = w t f? It takes screenshots? I've found that PRT SCRN doesn't always register. Think this will do a better job?
STAP = still looks like you're taking a poop mid-air. And basic speeder speed, you'll replace this at higher levels.

As far as I'm aware there's no special vendor or anything (just for CE and Security Key).
Or does it award access to a vip area and the 1.5 million speeder mount for purchase?

So... what's your opinion on these digital items now that you actually got them in-game?

32
Star Wars: The Old Republic / What do/don't you like about SWTOR?
« on: December 17, 2011, 01:53:36 AM »
Alright so I've only seen this game for the first time since yesterday.

I did the first two or three missions on a Consular, Smuggler, Trooper, Warrior, Bountyhunter and Agent.
I really planned to go woosh woosh with lightsabers, but found I didn't like the up close and personal combat at all.
And the cover mechanism is very clever, but just makes things too much of a fuss for my liking.
I've been told Consular gets more range at level 10, so I'll give that a go.
I love the Trooper and Bountyhunter and those are my two mains atm on each side.
I used a lot of 'I' there.

Swtor does offer a new MMO experience in my opinion. I love the storylines (big and smaller). The fact that your decisions in conversations define the path you take. The voicing really makes it interesting. And more importantly, all the different camera angles help spice things up when you enter a conversation.

Somehow there's a certain flow going on. Even though you're killing x of y along the way to your quest goal, it nevers feels like an x of y type of quest. Which is really nice. I find I really want to pursue and continue the storyline. They did an awesome job at this.

What I don't like is that the audio seems fucked sometimes. Probably a local thing. I keep lowering the volume levels for music and ambient, but they're always loud again when I start the game. Especially in the game menu before you're on a server, the music goes from hard to soft a lot. Bit annoying. Don't know what's going on.

Aggro seems very kind. You can bypass a lot of mobs without any trouble if you want. Easy looting (no companion yet).

I get the impression they are really trying to improve on the existing mmo model. It's just really enjoyable.

I really don't understand what's wrong with people that are level 50 already. What is the fucking point. Really. The whole game is about the story. Shaping your own destiny. And I think they've succeeded at providing that experience so far at lower levels.

33
Star Wars: The Old Republic / My sack is full!
« on: December 15, 2011, 11:16:05 AM »
So I read that there's this auction house limit of 50 items (per 48 hours or until sold).

People with three gathering professions are complaining because they can't sell off their shit due to the limit of items that you're allowed to have on sale.

True? False?

WHAT DO?

34
The Dog & Duck / On a more serious note
« on: December 11, 2011, 09:51:19 PM »
Hi,

An unusually serious and longish post this one. So if that's not your thing, hit that back button. :D

I do realize that this forum may not be the best place for stuff like this. But HoJ consists of lots of different people with all sorts of life experiences, and thanks to Mang has been an online home for me and many others to warm their hooves. 

I'd like your opinion, feedback. Negative or positive, all is fine. I hope to get some insights, even if just from writing it all down.
I have to give a somewhat elaborate intro so you can get into my train of thought for a little bit.

Sorry for the lack of headings. Maybe I'm just using this as a notepad for myself that I'll actually come back to, instead of not reading it again.


---

I'm male, 28 years old. Morbidly obese with 147,5kg at 1.78cm. Used to be taller, spine went meh. Always have been overweight. Fat baby, toddler, teen, etc. As a result my self confidence and worth have been shot to shit. During my years at university I went into a depression. Constant stream of suicidal thoughts. No real attempts. Felt like I couldn't do that to my parents. And was probably too scared. Did enjoy myself with a stanley knife though. Nifty collection of scars on my whole left arm.

I live in a 70m2 apartment that I 'bought' in 2007, just before the market went tits up. My mortgage is way higher than the value of the property.
I live there with my girlfriend (almost 5 years) and her sister has been renting the 2nd bedroom for well over a year now. We had the sister's best friend stay over for a few months as well, she crashed in the living room. Mind you, all three are of the sista variety, so things get/got loud sometimes.

Before and after I got my degree as a translator in 2006 I worked in the UK for a total of 13 months. First job and I had a falling out with the director. I decided I could not work for someone who wanted to be able to lie to my face and expected my to swallow it. Traineeship/job duration: 13 months.

Moved back to freaky deaky Dutchyland early 2007. Got a job in the gf's town and worked there for 2 years. I was good at what I did and really developed  my skillset (website editor/management). I was the go to guy for anything related to the website or online marketing. In that period of time, I gained 25kg because I tried to deal with work stress by stuffing my face. Got fed up with the corporate bullshit determining the company's course. Discovered I had values (yay!) and I thought you should treat customers right. I decided to move on. Job duration: 2 years.

So I applied for a job managing a pet website. Very informative, helping pet owners with advice. Kewl! All was well for 3 months. Then my employer decided he didn't want to continue that project anymore. Next 3 months were really crap. Project manager went on preggo leave. Colleague got sacked. And my contract wouldn't be renewed either after 6 months. Rent was cancelled. So for the last two months it was virtually me keeping up appearances, doing pointless work. Me no likey. Job duration: 6 months.

That employer really needed people with my skillset, but didn't want to offer me a new contract elsewhere because they wanted to decide on an online strategy first. Another company continued the pet site. They gave the other colleague a job. They didn't want me. This is where things went downhill I think. My professional skills have been my source of pride. It was something I was good at. Something I took pride in. It was a great part of who I was.

Meanwhile I had not only been developing in the area of online marketing, but also in the make money online market. Whether it be a web store, an information product, a forum, as an affiliate, etc. So I got a job at Victim Support as a webmaster, four days a week. One day for myself to excercise and work on my own websites. By this time I had some pocket money coming in from websites on autopilot after putting some effort in for a few days. Sadly, my job only existed on paper and in day to day activities I was just wasting my time there. So after talking to my manager we decided to scratch my position and find them someone that actually matched their real needs. Job duration: 11 months.

During this year (2010) I got into personal development. I sold the websites that brought in the pocket money to start anew with a clean desk and targeted plan.

At this time I randomly found a recent LinkedIn message from an old colleague at the company that participated in the pet website. They were merging various publishing companies. Neat new location. All sounded awesome. So I started there January 2011 for 5 days a week. Lots of talking, planning, etc. The dude was awesome. Great to work with. But as I learned more about the company, I found that it was an oil tanker that could only change course one degree at a time. That and mixing together people from five different publishing companies led to some organisational challenges. All in all, I didn't feel at home.

What's important is that in april 2011 I attended a three day seminar in the personal development space. Had to get up at 05:00am to get there in time, couldn't afford a hotel. Got home and went to bed at 01:00am. Seminar lasted from 9:00 - 21:00. It was an awesome experience. I went through a great range of emotions and activities. After three really long days and two very short nights, I came home after twelve with more energy I had ever had. That was a very strong signal to me that I was not doing what I was supposed to be doing on a normal work day. On work days I got home exhausted and tired. Even though it was a desk job.

So I talked to my awesome manager dude. And he understood the way I felt completely. He'd had one of those experiences himself during a 5 day training/activity. But he didn't really do anything with it after that. I didn't want to do that. I wanted to take action. So I told them I thought we should find a replacement for me. They suggest I'd stay on for 3 days a week. They repeatedly expressed their appreciation of me working there, but I told them I could not see my own value there. I was fucking off most of the time. I didn't do much. Plenty of opportunities to apply my skills, but I just couldn't get myself to do it. Talk to colleagues. Introduce myself. Etc. But we tried the 3 days a week thing. And that just made me realize how much happier I was the other 4 days of the week.

So in July we decided that August would be my last month. They were hiring great new online minded people to do the work I was supposed to be doing all year. And I would take a plunge with my own small business. Helping other small business acquire new customers and improve sales online. I had no financial reserves. So it was sink or swim.

I sank. Hard. At this point the gf didn't know a thing. I was feeling distanced from her and quite frankly ready to let go had she responded negatively to my decision. That's also why I didn't tell her. He'd just be negative. She has two university degrees and has her own issues with getting a job at her level, so she's working at a storehouse. She doesn't have any big goals. Doesn't strive to achieve much. I was a bit out of sink with her after spending a lot of time plowing through personal development materials. I was on a bit of a high.

So yeah. September came. No job. No savings. I had traded my sweet i7 pc for a two laptops. One for me and one to replace the gf's that had broken. I was hiding in the public library (free WIFI ftw) so the gf would think I still had a job. And I could barely get myself to type anything, do anything.

At some point I sent an email to my LinkedIn contacts. I had created several offers, ranging from online marketing consultancy to small website design. All priced very, very sweet. So after spending a few weeks in the foetal position and no real jobs from my 'big' promotional mailing I finally broke down and during a serious talk with my gf I told her about the job thing. She felt sorry that I thought I couldn't tell her. And I was sorry for simply being a douche.

After this point, we actually grew closer again. Had a few serious talks and I understood her more. I discovered that I hadn't really involved her in our household finances much at all. So she had no idea what had been going on. Quite frankly, my bank account hasn't been out of the red ever since I bought the appartment in 2007. And now I actually *want* to spend time with the gf, rather than mess about behind my pc and waste time online watching the latest memes unfold.

The gf was very understanding. She didn't realy flip out, because she could see how bad I was feeling at the time. And still am really. I was/am severely miserable and simply the thought of going to any office and picking up my old line of work (online marketing/website management) can actually make me feel nauseous. So she gave me some time to work on my shit.

Not surprisingly, I didn't make it happen. Spent a lot of time pondering. Thinking. Sleeping. Doing the dishes. Laundry. Everything but actually lay the foundation for my own tiny business. So I went to work in a storehouse as well. It was awesome. Voice picking orders. Walk around all day, quite independent work. I rather enjoyed it. I was calm. Felt at ease. It was very beneficial. But my ankle started hurting so severely that after coming home after work, I could barely walk anymore for that day after I had sat down for a bit. So after a month of working in the storehouse, I decided to stop. Even though it brought a drop of money in, that wasn't worth ruining my ankle for.

So there I went again. Firmly decided that I'd make it happen. And I did not. 

And here we are. Almost 4 months after my last day at the office in August. My ankle still acts up after things like going to town for shopping. So physical work where I have to be up and about all the time isn't an option. Going back to my old line of work in an office environment just won't fly in my mind. I won't function, just like I didn't earlier this year. All their bullshit targets and focusing on the wrong KPI's. Having to defend your own advice that colleagues ask for. I can't do that anymore. Maybe that sounds sad. I don't know.

I haven't gotten a professional opinion, but looking back at the past four years, I feel confident that I slowly dropped into a burnout type situation. If that's something you can't relate to, that's OK. You won't be able to if that type of thing hasn't happened to you. As with the depression and suicidal stuff, you need to have been there to really get that type of thing.

As you'd image after 4 months of not really working, money is tight. Built up a few k in debt and I'm surprised I have't seen a bill collector yet. We've been juggling a few bills and that house of cards will collapse after this month. I'm writing up a new financial statement as we speak to get a hold on things. Even though I made good money with my jobs, I never managed it well. That's something I'm really working on.

On a personal level, I've been much closer with the gf. And I've been happier. Calmer. Now my biggest challenge is the financial situation and that's causing a nice deal of stress.

Personally, I'd love to see it all go tits up. Get rid of the apartment. Rent a small studio. Gf can work a few days a week, I can work a few days a week and we'll get by. Sadly, the gf isn't really into that.

---

So much for the intro.  ;)

I guess at the core of it all, I'm very frustrated.
With how the world works. How corrupt and stupid everything around me is.
How they can give Greece a bajillion monies that don't exist and then scratch half of the debt. Just like that. Poof.

I do struggle with life a bit. The point of it all, etc. I'm planning on visiting a psychologist again asap to bother him with this type of stuff.  :D
People around me say I'm having a really early midlife crisis. That most people have this phase at some point and 'fix' it by having kids and moving on.

A feeling I've had for a while now, is that I just want to go away. Retreat in a small cottage in the UK. Or preferably a small house in the hills in Spain with a little pool. And just be left alone and spend time with my gf.

As for my own small business. I'm even doubting that. I'm really close to launching my own online website product. Helping small business owners to set up their site and then train them in online marketing. The market is there. I know several people that are easily making a good living out of that market, teaching  their clients shit stuff. I know I can do better. But I'm not doing it. And it doesn't even have to be better. I just need to take action and let people know I exist.

Thing is, I can get anyone else going online really fast. Analyze their business. Tell them what to do. Help them do it. No problem. But as soon as the time comes to do something for myself and in any way let people know that I can help them, I completely shut down. And right about now, I'm actually losing faith in my ability to help others as well.

I need to somehow learn to not give a damn about certain things. Something I've always sucked at in office jobs. I always care too much about what goes on. About my work. About myself in that company, etc. I can't seem to not care. I also spend far too much time thinking.

After all this rambling, which admittedly is really for me to read again in the morning and feel really silly so I can get my ass to work... I guess I have the odd actual question or two...

- Can anyone recognise this type of feeling/situation and offer any advice on how to snap the fuck out of it? I WANT to get cracking.

But I cannot get myself to DO anything that will help myself. It's hard to describe how frustrating it is to switch between overconfident and lacking any and all motivation multiple times a day.

- Can anyone think of a few types of work that aren't desk jobs, but aren't full tilt running around all day either? The storehouse work was alright. I used to do it during summer holidays. But I was younger and lighter back then. Ankly won't cooperate atm.

I've been planning to exercise more for a long, long time. Just an hour walk. A swim. I like it. I just don't DO it. (see the pattern?). So I'll at least start tomorrow off with that. Take an hour walk. Try and clear my mind and get to work.

I know far too fucking much. I've cut back on my information intake in all sorts of areas. I need to get myself to take action.
Even just now I get an email saying 'Grats, you made another xx euro' from an online information ebook I sell together with a trainer. I'm surrounded by evidence that what I know and can do works. Surrounded by people that believe in my skillset and in me as a person. But somehow I can't seem to join them. And I've found that is the most important thing. If you don't believe in your own capabilites, it doesn't matter who does. 

It's the same for being healthier. I know what I should and should not do. I've had success with a certain lifestyle that I enjoyed. But I keep falling back into a pattern called Feel bad? Stuff yo face!. So frustrating. I know I'm much happier when I eat a certain way and exercise a bit. But I cannot get myself to do it. I have one or two people that coach me and I'm very happy they support me. But that doesn't seem to do it for me.

If you have any advice, it's most welcome. If not, I'll come back and read this crap tomorrow and hopefully I'll see how ridiculous I've been for the past while.  I'm really looking for a way to somehow flip a switch. Stop thinking. Park all my self doubt. And just fucking do something for myself. And for reasons I can't put my finger on, I cannot get myself there.

Sorry if it all seems random. I'm sure I missed an important tidbit here and there.

If this all just confirms to you that I'm batshit crazy, that's alright.  ;)

/sigh

35
The Dog & Duck / 100% muscle
« on: December 07, 2011, 06:50:29 PM »
Fuck. Me. 

Pole action at 1:20. Very funky shit at the end.

BEST Pole Dance Ever by Jenyne Butterfly

I can't even get up that pole an inch.

36
Star Wars: The Old Republic / Get in the moods!
« on: December 07, 2011, 03:44:45 PM »
I saw Mang mentioning a Revan book.

I was planning on watching the saga again to get in the mood. But that's not in the swtor timeline.

Anyone got any tips? Any of the cartoons in that timeline at all? Or just books?

37
Star Wars: The Old Republic / The real question is...
« on: December 04, 2011, 12:58:18 PM »
Are there Lambent crystals in the game so I can have a pink lightsaber?

38
Can we try to stick better known characters (i.e. movies) to the SWTOR classes en specializations?
Or lesser known characters (books, lore).

Might not be a character for every specialized class.
And probably some silly suggestions in the first draft below.

Will update first post as comments and additions come up.

THE GALACTIC REPUBLIC

• Jedi Knight

Guardian
- Qui Gon Jin?
- Obi Wan Kenobi?
- Luke skywalker?

Sentinel
- ?

--------------------

• Jedi Consular

Sage
- ?

Shadow
- ?

--------------------

• Trooper

Vanguard
- ?

Commando
- ?

--------------------

• Smuggler

Gunslinger
- ?

Scoundrel
- Han Solo?
                                           
THE SITH EMPIRE

• Sith Warrior

Juggernaut
- Darth Vader?

Marauder
- ?

--------------------

• Sith Inquisitor

Assassin
- Darth Maul

Sorcerer
- Darth Sidious (The Emperor/Senator Palpatine)?
- Darth Tyranus (Count Dooku)?

--------------------

• Imperial agent

Operative
- ?

Sniper
- ?

--------------------

• Bounty Hunter

Powertech
- Boba Fett?

Mercenary
- Jango Fett


39
The Dog & Duck / Pudsey pluche
« on: November 21, 2011, 09:04:41 PM »
Are the CIN Pudsey pluchies still available? If so, which sizes (or keychain, etc) and prices?

40
The Dog & Duck / Goaty was bad, now NSFW
« on: November 16, 2011, 02:34:28 PM »
Teeheehee. I plummeted into the depths of a gutter this morning. Nudge, nudge, wink, wink.

41
The Dog & Duck / Tanned baby
« on: October 31, 2011, 03:53:36 PM »
http://www.dumpert.nl/mediabase/1786921/9b524d72/vrouw_zwanger_van_negert_door_3d_pornofilm.html

Now, there are plenty of examples of white couples having a black/coloured baby and even black couples having a white baby (not just light skinned and not albino). It's a rare genetics thing. And I'm a big fan of the cuckolding/interracial mature genre.

But blaming it on a 3d movie?
And the husband believing it?

What the fuck?

I was just getting warmed up to the USA after I've been talking to a long time friend over there.
But then I read about a guy pulling a gun at a restaurant because they forgot the sauce. The crazy extremist Christians. The article in the link above.
And I'm just thinking it's not worth it.

Does anyone know a nice place I can escape to? Preferably sunny and rural.  

42
The Dog & Duck / WUT?!
« on: October 30, 2011, 08:54:34 AM »
Before I fell asleep I put the clock on my phone back one hour.
Or at least I thought I did.

My phone says it's almost 9am atm.
All the atomic clock websites say it's 10am.

Did this older specimen of a telephone adjust to winter time automatically?  Adding an additional hour to my manual hour?

Can I still trust it? Can I trust you? Can I trust me?

WHO AM I?!?!?!

43
The Dog & Duck / You
« on: October 26, 2011, 04:05:25 PM »
I wanna take you to a gay bar.

Pwnd.

44
The Dog & Duck / Lady in... F*** OFF!
« on: September 09, 2011, 12:58:04 PM »
http://www.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/81812823/

It shouldn't be funny. But it is.

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