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EVE Online / Re: EvE Character Sticky Thread
« on: December 18, 2008, 11:01:29 AM »
Deb Acer is now faffing about in his bantam learning the game, I had forgotten just how wonderfully complex eve was!
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General Gaming / Re: Steam Usernames & HoJ Steam Group
« on: December 16, 2008, 05:59:13 PM »
Ello, no no I just can't stop playing left for dead! I've got eve downloaded just haven't go round to it, ill come visit this week. Honest 
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General Gaming / Re: Left 4 Dead
« on: December 12, 2008, 08:43:41 AM »
This game is fantastic. It's the only game where its not only acceptable but encouraged to run out of rooms blubbing "TAAAANNKK AAAAAARRHHHHHHH"
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Warhammer Online / Re: ORvR - Coming changes
« on: November 26, 2008, 02:06:47 PM »
ooo looking good!
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The Dog & Duck / Re: Star Trek XI New Teaser
« on: November 26, 2008, 12:47:57 PM »
I Hope the watchman film is shit. Not becuase I want it to be shit, I want it to be the best film adaptation of a comic book ever made. I just know that if I put an ounce of hope into it being any good at all itl turn out to be phantom menace all over again and I'm not sure I can die inside twice.
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The Dog & Duck / Very nearly just got myself sacked.. b3ta story.
« on: November 25, 2008, 01:46:33 PM »
Nothing to do at work I find myself reading through some of the question answers on b3ta. There always worth a slight chuckle but occsionally theres somthing of pant pissing brillance in there.
Well.. you may not find this that funny to be honest. I've just had bite to the point of near bleeding on my nuckles to prevent full blown giggling however. Read the whole thing, it's worth it, honest.
He had me going all the way there, proper bel aired innit
Well.. you may not find this that funny to be honest. I've just had bite to the point of near bleeding on my nuckles to prevent full blown giggling however. Read the whole thing, it's worth it, honest.
Quote
I used to work in a dockside bar that was, to put it mildly, a little rough.
It all began after I moved to this well-known (and utterly crap) port town. The town itself was bad enough, rammed full of ne'er-do-wells and a smorgasbord of freaks, but the closer you got to the port the worse the punters became. The vile clientele that poured through our doors was continuously topped-up thanks to the convenient location of the bar. It was the first watering hole the transients clattered into as they stepped off their ships onto terra firma. Some of our customers wouldn't have looked out of place in a zoo and a couple still make me shudder when I remember how nauseating they were.
The bar itself was a monumental shithole. The drab interior got wrecked most weeks by the locals fighting with the fleeting (then fleeing) masses. The owner had tried to add a pointless touch of sparkle by hosting live acoustic jazz bands most nights, but the contrast between the music and the atmosphere was laughable. Imagine a clarinet concerto in the aftermath of the Brixton riots and you'll be halfway there. My job as chief barman was without question the worst means of paying my rent I've ever had.
I'd only been working there for six months but I'd just about had enough, what with having to blindly ignore the constant criminal activity and put up with the ebb and flow of human detritus that wafted through. I’d developed a bit of a cunt's attitude to my customers, as it was the only way to get through the nights. The final straw came on a particularly busy shift. To give you some idea of the kind of bullshit I had to put up with, earlier in the day I'd endured a full sweep of the place by the authorities to assist them with a fucking manhunt. It was definitely not shaping up to be a good evening. I was serving a particularly short-fused customer with the motley jazz band in full swing when the door swung open. I knew at once we were due for big trouble.
It was a group of four drifters who looked *completely* out of place; that is, they looked relatively normal compared to our usual patrons. The first problem was that two of the members of this group were obviously flaming homosexuals and this was *not* a gay-friendly bar. The taller chap was a sight to behold. He was worryingly camp, wearing a lurid gold outfit that Liberace himself would have sent back to the shop for being too ostentatious. The short, fat one was relatively straight-acting but I’d already made my mind up. This feckless bling-clad mincer and his stumpy companion were attracting exactly the wrong kind of attention from the burly crowd assembled in front of the bar. I had to do something quickly, so I made it clear that I wouldn’t be serving either of them. The young bloke in the group had a quick word and thankfully, the sad-faced queers retreated rapidly towards the exit in order to avoid what otherwise would've ended with a merciless beating. I felt bad, but it was better than clearing up their body parts.
The other two gentlemen stayed in the bar. The old fellow wandered over to one of our regulars and started chatting, which was a little strange as I knew the guy couldn’t speak English at all. It seemed that they were acquaintances though, so I turned away from the bar for a moment to collect my thoughts. Almost as soon as I’d turned around, I felt a tug at my shirt. It was the young guy again. He gave me an understanding nod but didn’t actually say anything. I still felt rather grateful and relieved for his swift help a few moments earlier, so I handed over a free drink which he silently accepted.
Barely ten seconds later, it all kicked off. One of the foreign dockhands in the bar spotted my act of charity for this stranger and took exception to his special treatment. I turned to see this fearsomely-ugly thug march over to shove him hard and begin a drooling tirade of unintelligible drunken aggression. One of the dockhand’s mates joined in with the intimidation tactics. They were both very drunk, but I overheard him slur something about a criminal record followed by a death threat. That was par for the course in this place. The young stranger kept cool, but the altercation had obviously unnerved the poor chap. Before he’d had a chance to think about retaliation, his elderly friend had left the chit-chat with my regular customer and stepped into the situation himself.
The old man tried his best to calm things down, but by now it was too far gone and a fight was ready to break out. Without any further warning, the dockhand’s mate grabbed the younger guy and flung him across the room into a table full of drinks. I spotted a gun being produced so I ducked behind the bar, where I then heard a terrifying scream. The commotion died down and I re-emerged to find the assailant lying on the ground, one arm completely severed and the old man standing there wielding a glowing energy sword. I watched blankly as he returned it to his belt, my customers continued with their business and the band continued playing their god-awful music as if nothing had even happened.
Like I said, it was a fucking shithole.
He had me going all the way there, proper bel aired innit
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Warhammer Online / Re: Ard ta Feed: 19th November 8pm GMT
« on: November 24, 2008, 03:59:18 PM »
Parts orderd and to be deilvered wensday! I'm a maybe. It's gonna be a fresh install of the lot and I only get in at 4 so I doubt ill be on in time! I will certainly try however.
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Warhammer Online / Re: Inactivity Purge
« on: November 24, 2008, 12:21:19 PM »
I hate to say merge myself but...
I hold out hope for KH as a server we're what.. 3rd Core? Behind 8 peaks and the other one. It'l be a cold winter for warhammer unfortuntly I think smaller guilds disbanding and leading to the rise of 3-4 huge guilds isn't going to us any favours as far as the alliance system goes, but it's clearly inevitable.
Just a case of weathing out out to storm tbh. I like the way our allaince is now but if the numbers fail to improve I fear merging may be too viable a solution to ignore.
I hold out hope for KH as a server we're what.. 3rd Core? Behind 8 peaks and the other one. It'l be a cold winter for warhammer unfortuntly I think smaller guilds disbanding and leading to the rise of 3-4 huge guilds isn't going to us any favours as far as the alliance system goes, but it's clearly inevitable.
Just a case of weathing out out to storm tbh. I like the way our allaince is now but if the numbers fail to improve I fear merging may be too viable a solution to ignore.
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Warhammer Online / Re: Inactivity Purge & where is everyone?
« on: November 23, 2008, 02:39:00 PM »Lelle mentioned this in another thread and it sort of ties into this thread.
Where is everyone?
Its very quiet online since my return - although I havent been about much myself what with work and social stuff, for example today I am currently sitting in a starbucks near Marble Arch as I am off to twickers to watch the rugby today!
So out of all the people who I didnt purge - all those active AFTER the 25th October, where are they?
I fucked up my computer again! ill be back next week.
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Warhammer Online / Re: Levelling
« on: November 22, 2008, 07:23:45 AM »
Put out all the DPS you can dude or youl really feel that grind. Dosn't exactly cost much to keep respeccing.
I might have some old Axe's ill check my bank this morning.
I might have some old Axe's ill check my bank this morning.
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Warhammer Online / Re: Levelling
« on: November 21, 2008, 10:34:05 AM »
Aye, PVE chapters 18-20 all the way. Mix it up with occsional scenarios and ORVR but its in no way like the previous tiers.
Ideally as an IB you want to find yourself an AOE specced Runie to team up with, spec to hold mass multi aggro then pull anything that moves on the way to and at the quest location.
Otherwise spec is important if your not putting out max damage to PVE then it really will slow you down. Get yourself some Str/Wep skill gear have a big FOff axe in your hand and as long as your beating on things your level or 1 higher your exp will rocket.
Not sure what level you get it but the 15% crit at over 50 Grudge combined with Focused offence and Great Axe mastery allows for a very heavy damage output. Good bit of strength and a good axe youl chop through mobs like butter. With all that rested XP youl be laugthing the levels away.
Ideally as an IB you want to find yourself an AOE specced Runie to team up with, spec to hold mass multi aggro then pull anything that moves on the way to and at the quest location.
Otherwise spec is important if your not putting out max damage to PVE then it really will slow you down. Get yourself some Str/Wep skill gear have a big FOff axe in your hand and as long as your beating on things your level or 1 higher your exp will rocket.
Not sure what level you get it but the 15% crit at over 50 Grudge combined with Focused offence and Great Axe mastery allows for a very heavy damage output. Good bit of strength and a good axe youl chop through mobs like butter. With all that rested XP youl be laugthing the levels away.
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The Dog & Duck / Re: Star Trek XI New Teaser
« on: November 21, 2008, 10:07:28 AM »
Also Farscape was rubbish 
Sci-fi died when Firefly was canceld if anything!
Sci-fi died when Firefly was canceld if anything!
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The Dog & Duck / Re: Star Trek XI New Teaser
« on: November 21, 2008, 10:04:29 AM »
Cloverfeild is good because it employs a unique and inventive approach to both style and narrative. Confusingly however I'm not talking about the first person, hand held super effects... oh no, though at an initial glance the average film go'er may assume that the effects are indeed the meat of the production, what actually drives this film is considerably more subtle than you may have realized.
For the audience the focus is not on the monster nor with the spectacle of the First person hand held experience, the focus is with the characters... indeed both performance and dialogue constantly begging the question; Just when are these annoying hecks going to die?
Abrams genius was to write characters so amazingly unbearable that as long as an audience left the cinema happy in the knowledge that each asshole got crushed or eaten the rest of the film could be completely ignored.
While you may well have heard reports of people coming out of the cinema with motion sickness the stories of the 1000s of people weeping blood and eating their own face after viewing the opening 20 minute party sequence where mercilessly buried. Abrams going so far as to kidnap each and every critic who attempted to cover the story and sending them off to live on a mysterious island and never telling them what exactly was going on.
While audience’s deaths have been attributed to the opening section, relief that the yuppie twats all eventually die actually formed such strong bonds between cinema patrons that in many cases it led to marriage.
For the audience the focus is not on the monster nor with the spectacle of the First person hand held experience, the focus is with the characters... indeed both performance and dialogue constantly begging the question; Just when are these annoying hecks going to die?
Abrams genius was to write characters so amazingly unbearable that as long as an audience left the cinema happy in the knowledge that each asshole got crushed or eaten the rest of the film could be completely ignored.
While you may well have heard reports of people coming out of the cinema with motion sickness the stories of the 1000s of people weeping blood and eating their own face after viewing the opening 20 minute party sequence where mercilessly buried. Abrams going so far as to kidnap each and every critic who attempted to cover the story and sending them off to live on a mysterious island and never telling them what exactly was going on.
While audience’s deaths have been attributed to the opening section, relief that the yuppie twats all eventually die actually formed such strong bonds between cinema patrons that in many cases it led to marriage.
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The Dog & Duck / Re: A rant about the BBC
« on: November 21, 2008, 09:57:17 AM »
http://tvlicensing.co.uk/index.jsp
then "Get Help"
then "Computers and DVD players"
The ENFORCERS!! great name.. of course will probably tell you it requires one anyway but It's a simple matter of telling them to politely fuck off. I do enjoy wasting their time.
then "Get Help"
then "Computers and DVD players"
The ENFORCERS!! great name.. of course will probably tell you it requires one anyway but It's a simple matter of telling them to politely fuck off. I do enjoy wasting their time.